Saturday, September 8, 2007

Confessions of a lonely tyrant

I’m restless as a cat in heat
That happens to live across the street
My obsession with cricket
Is the outcome of a big-time frustration

Over paid and under worked
I merely sit and crib
About my collegues poor language skills
Yes, u must have guessed my identity by now
I’m the shrieking Pig, the boss of this sacred shrine

I carry a pink and blue lunch bag
Reminiscence of my LKG days
With pictures of Mickey-mouse and Pluto
And inside- my sugar-free, vegetarian food

I laugh like a thousand bats screeching
And detests anyone who shows any spark of talent
I defame, destroy, and suppress their lives
Because, of course, they are a threat to my position

My best friend is the grinning Mr. Commode-face
Who is my mentor, guardian and beloved
And I have a faithful slave
The dear little Scum
who gives me tit-bit news
Of the sex_ life of the Stuffed owl
Contemplate on the contents of the shoddy-sub-editors bag
And on what the lazybones had for lunch

He also helps me scratch my back
Pay my bills and lick my ass
Still I’m never contented
I’m forever worried, unhinged and insecure

Even the one-foot tall lilly
Gives me awful insomnia
Oh..I don’t know how to go on
My sorrows seem as endless
As the useless news articles that I write
Evn that I copy from press releases
I cant write – that’s the fact
But how do I tell it to anyone
Oh dear! Can’t you see how pathetic my life is
Day by day I have more things to hide from this world
It’s making me go insane….
Mr.Commode-face I need your help !!..
[ the other paparazzis can continue from here]

- the shoddy sub-editor


Anonymous said...

Refreshing to read S.S. after a long time. :)

Anonymous said...

Masterpiece...Keep it up S.S.
But, I have a request. Please replace 'polka dots' with something else dear. I feel offended:)