Ten time-tested ways of licking ass HERE

1.Leave behind your spine for a bunch of monkeys to discover the joys of trapeezing.
2.Discard matters of the flesh, errr, I mean, eat, digest and fart vegetables.
3. Address every one as 'saar.' Not even the most insignificant of scum should be excluded.
4.Sprinkle 'saar' liberally while having a conversation or even a mere verbal exchange with anyone belonging to the Sacred Order.
5.Nod your head in unison to whatever the big boss uttereth. Even if he says that eating raw banana skins is a panacea for erectile dysfunction.
6.Never forget to laugh your ass off when the big boss cracks a joke. Mind you, these jokes can later be used on your worst enemy and have the satisfaction of seeing him froth at the mouth and wince in pain.
7.Present the big boss with occassional chips packets. Thair sadam (Curd Rice) would be icing on the cake.
8. Beg him to let you help his highness by paying bills, carrying grocery loads home and make him herbal tea.
9.If ever an expletive escapes your lips, out you fall from the ass licking league.
10.Touch your mouth with your hand, bend forward. Strike this pose and there You Made It.